wander the sea

When does it end?

[Cynthia Via]

Why does it often feel life is ending in between cubicles and rows of computers? An unhealthy, lifeless work environment can leave you feeling useless, deprived of an otherwise meaningful existence. Everyone wants their days to count for something, and since many of us devote 40 hours a week to our a job, shouldn’t it also provided intellectual and personal growth? Not all jobs fall under this dark light. Some people love their jobs, and all the struggles that make it worthwhile.

But when people readily accept these lifeless condition for just “another day in the office,” and “you can’t do anything about it,” they start resembling a flock of sheep. Knowing when a 40-hour-work-week is not for you, or at least not in a particular place, can be difficult to process. The possibility of getting out is tied to expenses, the what if scenarios of not finding another job, but there’s also the possibility of exploring, and finding yourself again. Making the decision to get out of a work routine is like jumping to an almost groundless dept. Many people keep the same job for years out of habit or necessity— to pay bills, housing, and other expenses that have accumulated through the years.

Jumping to the unknown is rare, and it could happen on an ordinary day when you’re walking in the park, and you understand that you’re in the middle of all these interconnected parts, and you realize the magnitude of being alive.

Over the last couple of months my usual lunches in the park have kept me motivated; also writing about people I encounter, and meeting others who can relate to my feeling of alienation at not understanding the modern work culture. We have arrived at a place where we need to keep earning more to maintain our rate of consumption. There is always a want for more, but at what level do we put our mental well-being first.

It’s not always the case, but it’s valid to think about.

When does it end? I thought while walking on a grassy lawn, and wishing for the end. Around the corner was the beginning.

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